December 2023

2023 year was a horrible year for me.

• I’ve tried put together all my courses into a subscription — didn’t work.
• Right now, the money in my bank is at its absolute lowest.
• I’m feeling a huge stress about making money.

This is the state I’ve been in for the entire year — I’ve been struggling. It’s depressing. Yet, I tried to keep up an okay face towards almost everyone I meet.

After all, nobody needs to know about my sob sad story.

So why am I writing it now?

I don’t know.

I probably just want a place to reveal my honest feelings that I’ve hidden away from everyone else.

This blog has been my salvation of sorts since the beginning of time

This was a place where I could be totally transparent and vulnerable.

Somewhere along the way, that changed, as I tried to listen to Guru’s who talked about how to build businesses online.

• I tried following those instructions.
• I probably failed at doing most of that.
• I absolutely hated almost every moment of it.

Somewhere along the way, I lost myself, as I became a slave to potential customers — hoping that I will be of service to them in some way. Hoping they would buy my products in return.

That didn’t work too.

Now my spirit is broken. My finances are dry. I’m at the worst possible state of my life this year.

The fortunate thing is — I feel that I’m beginning to find myself once again.

I’m beginning to be authentic again.

With this post:

• I begin to reveal my sorrows
• I begin to take a stand back for myself
• I begin to create my sanctuary in the world — even though it’s in the interwebs and open to everyone who may read.

It’s no lie that I like to invite people into my life. I like to share both joy and sorrow — to anyone who may be willing to listen.

I’m probably just a sad fellow trying to plant my feet back on the ground again after numerous defeats right now.

So what?

I hold a victory for continuing to fight.

My business may not be doing well, and I may have made any wrong turns in the past.

So what?

They all serve as reminders and lessons on what not to do — and possible pointers for what to do instead.

I don’t know what 2024 has in store for me. But I’m going to take it on and not run away anymore.

Here’s to 2024.