Articles

Division of topics

I've been thinking a lot about this blog and why it has became difficult for me to write here over the last few years.

Family drama aside (which takes up lots of my energy), I've realized that the fundamental problem lies in the incompatible worldviews between different markets.

Because of this, I'm splitting up the blog into two separate websites:

• Magical Dev School — for coding related content
• Better Human — for life, philosophy, relationships, ontology related content

In this article, I want to walk you through some of my thought processes. I hope it helps you clarify the actions you need to do (in your life) that you may have been postponing. I wish that, after reading this, you'll find the strength and resolve to do take the next step.

How to stay sane when your partner is in a depressive rut

People who are in depressive ruts strain the emotional states of the people around them without knowing.

Feeding the wrong wolf

There's a Cherokee saying about the tale of two wolves that goes like this:

Compass, Path, and Journey

Going to the place you want to go is often difficult but not impossible.

Reflections on highlighting my violence

In my article where I shared that I called the suicide hotline for my wife, I expressed that I slapped her a couple of times, and that I feel guilty about it.

Convincing doesn't work

Trying to convince someone sets you up in an argument against them because convince (etymology) has the following roots:

• Vincere: to conquer
• weik: to fight/to conquer

When you fight to win someone, you'll either win or lose. No win-win situations can be created by fighting.

Look for alternatives to be on the same page so you can cooperate instead.

I called the suicide hotline for my wife

I called the suicide hotline for my wife on 15 December, 2024.

I'm writing this post to document the process that escalated to this call, mostly to a reference for myself, but I hope it serves as an aid for someone who may be going through similar experiences.

Don't try to make anyone happy

You'll encounter a couple of problems if you try to make people happy:

1. You begin pandering to their emotional whims. (This is problematic and is a road to misery).
2. If you overextend yourself, you'll want someone to pander to your emotional state as well. (Reciprocity and fairness, anyone?)
3. If nobody around you panders to you, you'll pander to yourself to balance the equation (good luck trying to avoid it).

Forcing the future

The future you want doesn't happen just because you try to force it to be.

It sucks. What sucks?

When we say it sucks, what do we really mean?

• Does the situation suck your energy away?
• Or do you turn that around and suck the situation to get nourishment and learnings from whatever was presented to you?

The word “suck” means to take in liquid and nutrients, so it might be worthwhile to change “it sucks” to “I suck” instead.

At the same time, “I suck” takes on a very different definition from what one would normally use it today.

“I suck”.

Gimme more.

Let’s go.

Everyone becomes a sellout at some point

It’s hard to resist that temptation — especially if you saw some initial results.

But selling out comes with a price far beyond any results they bring. The price is a destruction of trust.

Trust, once destroyed, can be incredibly hard to build again.

But not all hope is lost.

I have no facts to prove this, but a hunch tells me that everyone becomes a sellout at some point.

Perhaps it’s better to get this stage over and done with, then you’ll be able to plant you feet firmly back on the ground and do the work that what you’re meant to do all along.

You can’t write like Seth Godin

People normally say this if you want to write short articles. That's because you won't be able to get SEO traffic for such an article. (Google doesn't like short articles).

Stress for Metamorphosis

Caterpillars need to go through a metamorphosis to become a butterfly.

Hermit crabs need to look for new shells as they grow.

How to be good enough

You’ll never be good enough by thinking you aren’t good enough

Better spend your energy elsewhere.

Busyness

The chinese language is filled with hidden meanings that you can uncover if you study the word forms.